Victorian Roses Ladies Riding Society: April 2017

Did the Victorians have a secret “Love Language”? Here’s a thought: If there really were secret languages based on the below signals, that would mean most ladies and gentlemen would need to learn all these signs. If everyone knows the signals, its not such a secret after all, and we can all see you flirting!

Its such a fun concept, lets see what we can do to flirt!

Language of the Fan. You may have heard stories of Victorian women at a ball, dinner, musical evening or theater event, sending secret signals with her fan. Some of the most popular of these signals are:

To hold the fan with the right hand in front of the face. Follow me.
To hold it in the left ear. I want you to leave me alone.
To let slide it on the forehead. You have changed.
To move it with the left hand. They are watching us.
To change it to the right hand. You are imprudent.

To throw the fan. I hate you.
To move it with the right hand. I love another.
To let slide it on the cheek. I want you.
To hold it closed. Do you love me?
To hold it on the right cheek. Yes.

To hold it on the left cheek. No.
Fanning slowly. I am married.

Fanning quickly. I am engaged.
Hands clasped together holding an open fan. Forgive me.
Hiding the eyes behind an open fan. I love you.

Language of the Parasol. If you are outdoors taking the air and happen to meet a gentleman, the fan may not be the best accessory of choice! Ladies, use your parasol. But please be careful - don't put someone's eye out! These signals are much more obvious to the casual observer as you perform these tricky maneuvers.

The following comes from "Parasol Flirtation", Taranki Herald, 1891.

Carrying it closed in the left hand - Meet on the first crossing.

Carrying it closed in the right hand by the side - Follow me.

Carrying in front of you - No more at present.

Carrying it elevated in left hand - Desiring acquaintance.

Carrying it elevated in right hand - You are too willing.

Carrying it over the right shoulder - You can speak to me.

Carrying it over the left shoulder - You are too cruel.

Closing it up - I wish to speak with you, love.

Dropping it - I love you.

End of tip to the lips - Do you love me?

Letting it rest on the right cheek - Yes

Folding it up - Get rid of your company.

Putting it away - No more at present.

Striking it on the hand - I am much displeased.

Swinging it to and fro by the handle on the left side - I am engaged.

Swinging it to and fro by the handle on the right side - I am married.

Tapping the chin gently - I am in love with another.

Twirling it around - be careful, we are watched!

The Language of Gloves. Yes, you can flirt with your gloves! Very similar to the fan and parasol, here are their signals.

Biting the tips - "I wish to be rid of you very soon!"

Clenching them, rolled up in right hand - "No!"

Drawing half way on left hand - "Indifference"

Dropping both of them - "I love you"

Dropping one of them - "Yes"

Folding up carefully - "Get rid of your company"

Holding the tips downward - "I wish to be acquainted"

Holding them loose in the right hand - "I am content"

Holding them loose in the left hand - "I am satisfied"

Left hand with the naked thumb exposed - "Do you love me?"

Putting them away - "I am vexed!"

Right hand with the naked thumb exposed - "Kiss me"

Smoothing them out gently _ "I am displeased"

Striking them over the shoulder - "Follow me"

Tapping the chin - "I love another"

Tossing them up gently - "I am engaged"

Turning them inside out - "I hate you!"

Twisting them around the fingers - "Be careful, we are watched!"

Using them as a fan - "Introduce me to your company"

Victorian Eye Flirtation chart from 1891

Another chart from the 1800s is on Dining Table Signaling.

There are also flirting signals with hankies, hats, postage stamps, and standing-at-the-window signs. A girl has to study and learn all these methods if she wants to catch a man! 😆